I Used to Be Somebody: (Un)Retirement Lessons Learned

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My Three Years of (Un)Retirement -- Chance to Reinvent Yourself

Carl Landau | May 30, 2023
I just went past my 3-year mark of what we like to call (Un)Retirement. It's about no longer having the big job and now you have the time to freestyle and figure out what you want to do with the remainder of your life. There are just a few times in your life that you can naturally reinvent yourself. The biggest opportunities for that are; 1) after you graduate from high school or embark on a career path, and 2) life after the big job, aka NOW (for some of us).
 

 

The normal benchmarks for success previously come to us as annual reviews at work or if you're an entrepreneur, it's a profit/loss company statement. At this post-career stage of life, those metrics don't apply anymore. Not a all! It's a total self-examination that's completely wide open and even a bit challenging. Don't compare yourself at this point in time to your friends and peers. You can be totally subjective and it's all up to you if you want to evaluate how you're doing.


The one universal thread that rings true (and I know it might sound obvious) is we all need purpose when we wake up in the morning to get out of bed. It doesn't matter what that purpose is-- whether it's spending time with a grandchild, starting a new company, volunteering for a cause you are passionate about or playing a sport like pickleball. You've got to have that drive. And for extra credit, if you create a diverse set of passions, all the better!
 
What I've learned
It takes time to figure out this (Un)Retirement thing. Like most people, it's not so easy in the beginning. Getting used to this sort of wide open yet vague new world is weird! I spent the first year worrying that I should be doing more things and in the back of my mind, I felt like I was forgetting something from my work. I was so used to running a business for my entire adult life that it was ingrained in me that I always had to be super busy.

 
Work PTSD
Once I slowed down, I realized that I actually suffered from some sort of PTSD from the event business I ran for 20 years. For years I would have bad nightmares about the event I was working on. I think it was from the pressure of getting enough attendees to sign up for the events. And my recurring nightmare was that we aren't ready for attendees, lots of scrambling. It makes no sense because we were always ready. But, it took me two full years until the nightmares finally faded away. 
 
New Stuff
What I really enjoy doing is creating new projects and businesses. I started my (Un)Retirement during the pandemic. I love listening to podcasts and I decided to start working hard to create a new podcast business with me as the host. On a whim, I called my new company Pickleball Media (because l also love pickleball) and our target audience is Baby Boomers who are at the forefront of the (Un)Retirement AND pickleball wave! 
 
When I started researching the pickleball industry, I realized that there were incredible business opportunities. There were no real business-to-business conferences or a tradeshow in this emerging sport. Maybe I could seize the opportunity and make a ton of money and get that high from creating another new event. But, instead.......
 
Learning to say NO 
I said "no" to the pickleball opportunity because it would have taken me right back to where I already had been. I decided to move forward into the new with my life and not go back to the stress and anxiety of the event business (remember the nightmares). So now I have a new rule for my (Un)Retirement. "If it sounds like so much work, I don't want to do it." I'm not afraid to work hard. But I don't want to be consumed by work ever again. I've moved past that now.

 
Changing course
During the first year of (Un)Retirement I started the I Used to be Somebody podcast and newsletter every week. I truly love doing it. But after 10 months I realized that this weekly schedule felt like real work again (see above rule #1). I used to fill out my Google calendar with all the interviews and deadlines for the podcast and newsletter and if I had any extra time available, I'd play some pickleball.
 
Once I noticed this trend, I reversed my work / play agenda. I went to a monthly podcast and newsletter and would first fill my calendar with pickleball 4 times a week, and then fill in the fun things with friends and family and what was left over time-wise went to work. I reversed my priorities......and I'm so much happier!
 
Getting out of your comfort zone
Probably the most difficult yet satisfying thing I've done so far in (Un)Retirement is to take a stand up comedy class and perform before 100 people. I've always been interested in stand up and saw a new class taught by a very talented comedian Jack Gallagher, here in Sacramento. I saw an ad on Facebook and signed up immediately for the workshop without even discussing it with my wife or anyone else. I was afraid if I told someone and thought more about it, I'd chicken out.
 
We've all seen stand up comedians. It looks easy. Trust me, it's not easy! Not only do you write your own material but you need to deliver it as well. (Which are entirely different skills, btw.) I have so much respect for comedians now. We only had five classes, two hours a week and then on the sixth one, we performed live before a big audience. The last thing I wanted to do was embarrass myself and bomb. I took the whole thing very seriously. I probably practiced my set 80 times. (Just ask my wife.)
 
Jack's goal was for each of us to do a five minute set. My set ended up being 12 minutes and I fully expected Jack to cut it down at the end. At our dress rehearsal one week before the show, I asked Jack what I needed to cut out. He said, "No cuts. It's great! You're going to do it all."  At the show, I nailed it. It was one of the highlights of my life! Carl's 12 minutes of Comedy Gold
 
Taking risks reaps rewards
So the decisions I've made so far in (Un)Retirement have given me a new perspective on what matters most: 
  • Sleep matters. With less stress in my life, I sleep so much better. I used to sleep on average about 5 1/2 or 6 hours a night. Now I get my full 8 hours of sleep plus a short afternoon nap sometimes. Sleep is so important for  overall health.
  • Exercise matters. I play pickleball 4 days a week now. And I walk 10,000 steps a day on the non-pickleball days. I've lost about 8 lbs. this past year. I stretch / meditate (with my cat Felix) 20 minutes every day and love it!  I feel much better physically and mentally.
  • Friends matter. I've reconnected with several friends from my childhood and 20's and visited them. Since my career took me out of town a lot, I didn't have much time to meet people locally. Now I've got more local friends than I've ever had. Just joining a pickleball club gave me a dozen new friends that I see all the time. As you get older, an active social life makes a huge difference in your state of mind.
  • You matter. Learn how to say NO. I simply avoid negative people and things I don't want to do. No more endless zoom calls and I've stopped doing online presentations. (Do people really want to watch 3 talking heads on a Youtube video?) I spoke at a live, in-person conference last month in New Orleans and loved it. I don't want to live in an only-virtual world. I want to make real connections with inspiring people and I don't need to do it only online.
 
I think the biggest thing I've learned so far is not to worry so much about stuff.  Most of our worries aren't something that we can control or influence in any way. Somehow I've developed a new mindset that allows my worry quotient to go down. 
 
Of course, I don't have all the answers to my life all figured out yet. But, after 3 years of (Un)Retirement, I feel like I know some of the questions and I like the newly reinvented me.
Tags:    the carl diary   unretirement   comfort zone   pickleball   stand up comedy   second act   reinvention  

Carl Landau Interview: Celebrating Episode #50 -- Our Host Reveals it ALL!

Diana Landau | December 14, 2021

In this last episode of 2021, we flip the podcast-- and Diana, Carl’s wife/content wrangler/blogger interviews the host. As she interviews Carl, they do a bit deeper dive into his childhood, his parent's divorce, the family barrel business started by his grandfather, his late-blooming teens, and his college years.
 
After a few marketing jobs post-college, Carl moved out to San Francisco in his early 20’s, landing a sales position with Miller Freeman, a B-to-B publishing giant (at the time). While working with exciting magazine titles like “World Coal”, Carl realized he could launch a magazine of his own. It also happened to be the early 1980’s in the Bay area, as coding and computers took off. At 26, he launched his first magazine, “Computer Language.” He then launched a magazine a little ahead of its time, “AI Expert.” (Artificial Intelligence)
 
After selling those magazines and taking a couple of years off in his first (un)retirement, Carl identified the craft beer and wine homemaking trends and launched “Brew Your Own”, “Brew Pub” and “Winemaker” magazines. After selling those magazines in the early 2000s, Carl saw that the magazine industry conferences seemed to be only for the big titles, when 95% of the magazine market was smaller, niche titles. (Think Concrete Today, VegNews, Backyard Poultry)
 
Carl launched the Niche Magazine Conference in 2007 producing hundreds of niche magazine seminars and conferences nationwide. He sold that company in 2019. As our audience knows, Carl started a podcast in 2020 during the pandemic, making himself the guinea pig for a show about people who had big-time jobs and now wanted to do something new in their Second (or Third or Fourth) acts of life. He also offers some insights into what it was like to launch the podcast and some news about the new future of the I Used to be Somebody show. Listen in to find out!
 
Carlism Trivia:
What question does Carl NOT ask podcast guests?
  1. What was the worst job you ever had?
  2. Can you summarize your (un)retirement in four of five words?
  3. What is your pickleball experience?
  4. How much did you weigh as a baby?
  5. What was your childhood like?
Email your answer to podcast@pickleballmediahq.com for a chance to win a free Pickleball Media hat.
• More about Carl Landau and the Pickleball Media Team
• Sponsored by Capital Advantage
• Sponsored by LoveMyHeartStudy.com
 
Diana Landau is the Content Wrangler for Pickleball Media. After 15 years in corporate marketing, in 2012 she pivoted to write and wrangle content for Niche Media's weekly blog. She now manages the “I Used to Be Somebody” weekly blog.
 
Tags:    blog   interview   unretirement   carl landau   anniversary   second act   podcast  

Pickleball Life Lessons with Mo

Carl Landau | August 10, 2021

 

Mo NardWe started our company Pickleball Media at the beginning of the pandemic. A weird time to start anything. But, I decided that I had to do something since I had just sold my business and came up with the idea of creating a podcast about Second Acts. I would be the guinea pig for this second act idea. To complicate the idea more, we wanted to incorporate our new love for the game of pickleball into the show. It all made no sense whatsoever but amazingly has worked out.
 
I enlisted my pickleball instructors Mo Nard and Reine Steel to help. Which one does???
 
Mo co-hosts my episode segment "Pickleball Life Lessons with Mo" and Reine created an amazing website for us (which she does in her real life).
 
Our segment "Pickleball Life Lessons with Mo" has been a huge hit. The funny thing is that people that don't know anything or care about pickleball love this part of the show. I just wanted to share 10 great segments. It's a fun listen. You can hear the friendship between Mo and I grow from week to week. Keep in mind it all began during the pandemic. We'd be 15 feet from each other on the end of the tiki bar each week. Oh, and we finally figured out how to use the microphones / recorder after about 20 episodes.
 
10 "Life Lessons with Mo"

We're here to confuse you
Mo wants to bring recess back in our lives
Are you feeling lucky?
Partner Up!
The life and times of Mo Nard
Mo'see up to the Line
Unwanted Advice!!!
Mo is Drunk!
Under the Lights!
Mo Likes to Hit People
 
If you want to hear all of the entire episodes just go here!

 

• Sponsored by: lovemyheartstudy.com or call (866) 955-1594
 
• Sponsored by The Monkey Creative: themonkeycreative.com
 
Carl Landau is the Creative Genius here at Pickleball Media. He is the former Grand Poobah at Niche Media. 

 

Tags:    blog   interview   mo nard   pickleball   life lessons   website   second acts  

Susan Stewart Interview: Do it, Don’t Wait! One Life!!!

Diana Landau | June 22, 2021

 
When you meet Susan Stewart, you think right away that you must be friends. She really cares about people. A former golf prodigy then pro, a colleague along the way saw her promise and helped her build her resort merchandising career. Then in 2017, tired of corporate life, she risked it all (her wife was very supportive) and started her own retail store in 2017. Strapping sells funky, kitschy, relevant, irrelevant, unusual items and it’s been a big hit with two stores and a thriving online business.

 

Susan has a successful business in a neighborhood in a transition with a long history but no surprise--she has become a community leader and advocate. She's advocate for everyone! She just opened in her second store during a pandemic—and she’s excited about it! (You’ll see in the podcast episode.) She is inspiring and inspires others with her infectious energy.

 

This budding yet savvy entrepreneur grew up in Hudson Valley in New York. Her parents were chefs and eventually the family moved to Palm Springs. As a child, Susan loved golf. After high school she had a job with Paramount Studios as a runner, meeting Frank Sinatra, Bob Hope and one of her golf heroes, Arnold Palmer.

 

A couple of careers later, Susan decided to go for it. “In January I had the idea, in February I found the space, in March I got the key and in April I opened!” she says. “I’m a doer. I think most entrepreneurs are. You jump in with both feet!” Now she is a successful shop owner who really views her business as a way to be an integral part of the community. Susan is hoping to hire some extra management and play a little more golf, looking for that sustainable life balance.

 

Susan’s advice on becoming an entrepreneur in your Second Act:
  • “Failure is okay, it brings you to where you are.”
  • “People always ask me; how did you pay for this? Be prepared that banks aren't going to loan you the money.”
  • “Entrepreneurship is not for the faint of heart. You have to be adaptable. You have to really see your failures and grow from it.”
  • “You don't know that you don't know something until you (eventually) know something!”

 

 

Diana Landau is the Content Wrangler for Pickleball Media. After 15 years in corporate marketing, in 2012 she pivoted to write and wrangle content for Niche Media's weekly blog. She now manages the “I Used to Be Somebody” weekly blog.

 

Tags:    blog   susan stewart   interview   unretirement   golf   retailer   lgbtq   second act   third act   entrepreneur  

Cinde Dolphin Interview: Queen of Positivity!

Diana Landau | May 18, 2021

 

Episode 30 Cinde Dolphin - Big Time Coors Beer Exec Turns Unlikely Entrepreneur

Carl interviews Cinde Dolphin this week live in the Landau Tiki Bar. She had a big-time career in Marketing for Coors for 28 years, then transitioned into public relations and social media in California. Along the way, Cinde had four battles with cancer—that spurred her on to become a first-time entrepreneur in her 50’s to invent a medical equipment product to make her life and those around her better. (It’s a common theme with Cinde, you’ll see.)
 
Cinde mostly grew up on the sunny beaches of Southern California and despite some challenges at home became determined at a young age to be a positive person and an agent for change. After college in San Diego, she was hired by United Way to work in public relations. “It was worthwhile and so inspiring,” Cinde tells us. She was eventually hired away by Coors and had a great career in Marketing for them. She worked all over the country. “I had a lot of fun!” Cinde says of that time.
 
When Coors was merging with Miller, she knew it was time to do something new but wasn’t ready to be "done" with working. Cinde decided to make a change after 28 years and moved to Sacramento, California. She squeezed in a fun "gap" year and then worked her industry contacts and started up a PR and social media agency for California winemakers. 
 
While still at Coors, Cinde fought her first battle with cancer. After the third cancer diagnosis many years later, she saw a void in the medical supply industry. At the time, patients after surgery had external drains attached to them—by safety pins! (A 50-year-old practice.) Cinde invented a special "apron” of sorts that is much more convenient and comfortable for patients. It’s been tested at University California, Davis Medical Center and launched Cinde’s new career as an entrepreneur/inventor. She's also been in remission now for eight years.
 
In Cinde’s spare time, (she enjoys hang gliding and rock-climbing too), she has made three trips to Africa in the last five years to work with women in Kenya and Tanzania to start their own small businesses, so they can support their families and pay school tuition. “It was a life-changing experience,” Cinde says of her first 3-month trip to Africa. “Now these women are entrepreneurs. I am still close to those women.” Cinde loves volunteering and is doing as much as she can. “When you volunteer you have to learn how to be a team player, not the boss, not micro-managing—and it brought a lot to me personally to be just someone who helps. It’s a great life lesson and I’ve made some great friends along the way.”
 
Cinde’s advice on starting a business as a Boomer:
  • “Find a tribe to help you get through it. I found a co-working space with other startups, we help each other. It’s a good kind of camaraderie.”
  • “Contact a Small Business Development Center. They had so many resources to help me get started.”
 
Her life advice:
  • “Identify something that is not already being done and make that your signature in the world. I have found a way to distinguish and make it a legacy. It’s rewarding!”
  •  “The shoe can fall at any time, so maybe that’s what makes me a little risk-involved, I can afford to take chances. It makes me appreciate making every day special.”Check Out More Super Fun Unretirement Ideas
 
• More about Cinde Dolphin: https://medicaldraincarrier.com/news/

 

Diana Landau is the Content Wrangler for Pickleball Media. After 15 years in corporate marketing, in 2012 she pivoted to write and wrangle content for Niche Media's weekly blog. She now manages the “I Used to Be Somebody” weekly blog.

 

 

Tags:    blog   cinde dolphin   interview   coors   executive   cancer   second act   entrepreneur   boomer   marketing  

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