Rebecca Davis Interview: Co-Creator of "Join or Die"
Diana Landau | February 11, 2025
This month's episode is a unique one. Carl interviews filmmaker Rebecca Davis about her new, award-winning documentary, "Join or Die." She is a director and producer of short and long-form documentaries and was previously a senior producer with NBC News for nearly a decade. Though Rebecca is not near retirement, her movie sheds light on how the "(un)retired" can create community in a time when the isolation of the internet and cell phones can absorb much of their daily lives. The movie explores how joining clubs and organizations, in addition to engaging in intergenerational exchanges and mentorship can actually serve to strengthen our society. "Join or Die" is now on Netflix. (Spoiler Alert! Carl is a huge fan of the movie and its message.)
Rebecca grew up in a middle-class family in Virginia, near Washington D.C. "My brother and I felt lucky to grow up there, as we were exposed to lots of different perspectives," she says. She was also inspired by her father, an anthropologist with a curious eye on the world and community life. In high school, Rebecca worked on the school newspaper with dreams of becoming a journalist and photographer. She tells us that after college and the advent of the digital age, she found a way into video format from journalism and photography, "as a way to do storytelling and explore the narrative more."
Rebecca began working on "Join or Die" when she was still a full-time media producer, working on the film on weekends. It was her first documentary and took 8 years to complete. She says making the film was a "life raft, emotionally" for her as news production isn't always that positive. She was inspired by the work of political scientist and author Robert Putnam, whose earlier work, "Bowling Alone" went viral. Americans had stopped joining clubs and civic organizations. Even the number of dinner parties and picnics had declined. His research showed that those "joining" activities directly correlated to how our Democracy is doing.
Politicians on both sides of the aisle have been supportive of Rebecca's documentary and understand the implications for a healthy nation. After living in NYC for decades, Rebecca has recently moved back to the Washington D.C. area to be closer to family. She notes, "The irony of the internet is someone might know what is happening in a neighborhood in China, but not what's happening on their very own street. And when someone tells me they watched my film and they are now joining a club, I feel really good about that!"
Rebecca's 2nd (or 3rd) Act Advice:
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"Community happens when you do what you love with others. The bar doesn't have to be high to get going-- start a cycling group, form a movie night, create a cookbook club."
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"Start with a group and then do the hard work of showing up every week. The gains come from doing that."
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"Live the life you want to live in the future right now, and see where that leads you!"
Diana Landau is the Content Wrangler for Pickleball Media. After 15 years in corporate marketing, in 2012 she pivoted to write and wrangle content for Niche Media's weekly blog. She now manages the "I Used to be Somebody" blog
Sky Bergman Interview: Professor Turns Filmmaker
Diana Landau | February 29, 2024
Carl interviews filmmaker Sky Bergman. Sky's directorial debut, "Lives Well Lived" is currently airing on PBS, Amazon, iTunes and Kanopy. The documentary is a collection of fascinating interviews with about a dozen older adults sharing historical perspectives, their advice for future generations ad reflections on living a life well lived. Making documentaries is her second act as she is also an accomplished, award-winning photographer and still teaches photography at Cal Polytechnic State University in San Luis Obispo, CA.
Sky's parents were divorced so she grew up in Philadelphia, Florida and spent summers in upstate New York. She says she had the good fortune of living in a four-generational household. Her father was a geriatric physician. "He would come home and tell me these amazing stories about his patients. I know that colored my consciousness to want to be part of older people's lives and tell their stories."
In school, she was a bit of an introvert and a band geek. She found her passion for photography at an early age. "I fell in love with the dark room!" she says. After college she traveled the world as a professional photographer. Her artwork is included in permanent collections at the Los Angeles Museum of Art, Brooklyn Museum, Seattle Art Museum, the Bibliothèque Nationale de France, among others. Her commercial work has appeared on book covers for Random House and Farrar. She says a highlight of her photography career has been the cover of the Smithsonian Magazine in 2001. "I loved traveling and photography so I could follow both passions at the same time."
After teaching for many years, Sky (un)retired at age 56. "I wanted to make a movie about older generations and share their stories with the world." She put together a list of interesting people and a list of 20 questions for them. Carl asks her how she was able to fund the movie. "I have never let money stand in the way of what I want to do," she tells us. Sky decided the grant submission process was too lengthy for her, so she came up with a revenue-generating plan by renting out rooms in her home. She tells her visitors they are helping to fund her movie and they end up excited supporters as well. "A crazy, wonderful way to fund a film!" she acknowledges.
"Lives Well Lived" debuted to a sold-out audience of 850 with her grandmother and many of the film's subjects in attendance. It was a true highlight for Sky. She is now working on two new projects, "What is Mochitsuki?" a film celebrating family, tradition and mochi, and a documentary about the "Prime Time Band", a band of musicians aged 40 to 90 who are reigniting old passions. Sky says, "The only way to combat ageism is to make generational connections!"
Sky Bergman's (un)retirement advice:
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"Pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone makes for a more interesting life."
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"Develop a new sense of purpose after you retire. Who are you now and what do you still want to do? Whatever it is, you have to plan and think about your future. Remember, finding your sense of purpose is life-long, and can change over time."
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"Have a good support system--not just family but also friends."
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"Attitude and resilience go hand-in-hand. There are so many times in our lives when we cannot control what's happening around us. But we can control our attitude about it."
Diana Landau is the Content Wrangler for Pickleball Media. After 15 years in corporate marketing, in 2012 she pivoted to write and wrangle content for Niche Media's weekly blog. She now manages the "I Used to be Somebody" blog.
Melissa Davey Interview: Take that Detour!
Diana Landau | April 13, 2021
What a compelling interview this week! Carl interviews Melissa Davey, age 71, a documentary filmmaker, director and executive producer of "Beyond Sixty". It all started when Melissa made a brave, bold move at 65—she took that detour! Prior to her work in film, Melissa had a big-time career as a national Senior Vice President for Genex, developing and managing the Social Security Disability Programs, where she worked for two decades.
Growing up, Melissa’s family was on the move, living in New Jersey, Massachusetts, Connecticut and Vermont. “Each time we moved I became more curious about everything.” As an adult, Melissa took an unconventional path, marrying young, having children young, divorcing young. “Looking back, I am so glad I experienced my young life in the way that I did. I really don’t believe I would have made the choices I have if it had been different.”
At 65, Melissa knew that she was ready to do something new, but not sure what. On a whim, she bid on a charity prize for the M. Night Shyamalan foundation, a day on the set with the well-known director. She won and had the opportunity to spend the day watching how a film was made.
Then, a pivotal lunch conversation with the director changed everything.
He said to her, “What do you do?” Melissa attempted to briefly explain the complexity of the insurance industry. “What do you want to do?” he asked. Melissa answered, “I want your job!”
The director nodded and replied, “Well you better hurry up.” This conversation stayed with Melissa. She had always been interested in films but had no time for it with her hectic schedule.
Melissa came up with a great idea for a film and a brave, bold plan. She told her husband she was going to quit her job and film a documentary, even though she had no experience making films. She told her boss she would transition out over a year, giving her time to set up her filmmaking process and conduct some interviews for the project. A year later, she devoted her time to creating, producing and directing “Beyond Sixty….” a documentary about the fascinating lives and accomplishments of women in their 60’s, 70’s and beyond. “The film brings women’s voices forward…and we still have much time left to do new things.” “Beyond Sixty…” released on streaming video this week. “It’s been so amazing!” Melissa says of the journey. “Who knows? Maybe I’ll make another movie!”
Melissa Davey’s Advice for (Un)Retirement:
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“Make sure you take the detour every time it’s presented to you because you never know what’s down that road, you never know what might present itself to you as an opportunity.”
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“When you take off in a career you put your body and soul unto that and sometimes you have to walk away from relationships you’ve had—there’s no time. When you stop working so much, you have time to reconnect. It’s funny, with the good ones you just pick up right where you left off.”
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“After 3 decades of being the boss it’s your identity (and ego.) You had a team of people to help you accomplish things. I have a great appreciation for the people who helped me!”
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“Exiting your work life is a huge transition. Push through the fear. Most of our inability to move forward is fear-based.”
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“You really are never too old to try something new. I’m going to do another film, and maybe another!”
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“Learn how to pivot. It’s never too late!”
Diana Landau is the Content Wrangler for Pickleball Media. After 15 years in corporate marketing, in 2012 she pivoted to write and wrangle content for Niche Media's weekly blog. She now manages the “I Used to Be Somebody” weekly blog.
Retirement as an Escape
Carl Landau | March 16, 2021
My wife and I just watched two thought-provoking movies, back to back.
The first one was Nomadland. After losing everything in the Great Recession, a woman embarks on a journey through the American West, living as a van-dwelling modern-day nomad. She travels the country and still works occasionally, meeting all kinds of people on her journey.
The second movie was Some Kind of Heaven, a documentary. It follows the lives (and challenges) of four people who live in The Villages, a mega-senior, Disney-esque community in Florida, home to approximately 140,000 people—seniors only!
These two movies were strangely similar in the fact that there are some people of (un)retirement age who just want to escape. To me personally, that doesn’t sound so great. But both movies stayed with me and made me think.
Nomadland showed (un)retired people who were often triggered by something in their lives, usually a trauma, to move on while shunning mainstream life. Some Kind of Heaven is just that—a place where seniors from all over the country come to live out their dream retirement. But is it?
My first reaction was to be judgmental. But if something terrible or unexpected thing happened to me, who knows what choices I would make? If I lived somewhere I didn't like or had few relatives or friends, maybe I would want to live out the stage of my life in an entirely different way. Who knows?
What I've learned from talking with our podcast guests is that you can’t look down on others who don't make the same choices you do. As Episode #21’s guest Ed Casey says, “(Un)retirement is like a fingerprint. Everyone is different.” I can’t think of a better way to make the case that we all need to enjoy life right where are, right now.
